Well That Didn't Work
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Hey everyone, I'm home again; I got back from Florida on Monday, but have been both too busy and too lazy to blog. As I believe I've mentioned in an earlier post, Dennis spends his summers in Miami with his father who moved down there after he and Dennis' mother were divorced. Seeing as Dennis and I have been dating for nearly a year and a half, his father invited me to visit for a while this summer. Being in Florida was a welcomed changed from home life which I only barely managed to survive 5 days of before approaching the brink of a complete emotional collapse. (See last entry) Seeing Dennis was, as always, wonderful and being awoken by a kiss every morning made me happier than I've been in a very long time.
Dennis' father suffered a stroke-type brain clot when he was nineteen and was the first to survive the rare condition and risky surgery he underwent to fix it; however, that surgery only saved his life, it did not restore him to the health he had taken for granted only a short time before. Dennis tells me that when he was younger, his father used to take care of him and his brother when they came to visit, but those roles have slowly reversed over the last few years. Dennis now helps his father with everything from cooking to computer work instead of getting summer jobs and hanging out with friends like most teenagers, but apparently, his father couldn't care much less.
While I had a wonderful time in Florida (staying up talking until all hours of the night, bowling, arcading, playing with the world's cutest puppy and swimming,) my visit was dampened by seeing the way Dennis' father treats him. That man is the most inconsiderate person I have ever encountered, and considering some of the members of my family, that says a lot. Its not just that his father is ungrateful for the sacrifices Dennis makes for him each year, he actually seems to go out of his way to make his sons' stay with him as miserable as possible. For example, Miami has a very large Cuban population and there's a special bakery that makes Cuban pastries that Dennis adores and insisted I try while I was down there. His father is currently in a wheel chair and as such, does not drive (or for that matter own a car) so anytime Dennis needs or wants to go somewhere, he has to take a cab. Dennis made a special trip to the bakery while I was in town and bought eight pastries: two for him, two for me, two for his brother, and two for his father. We brought them home and put them in the refrigerator and then decided to go a mall near his father's apartment. When we returned home, all but two of the pastries had been eaten. Its not just that though. He wakes Dennis up early every morning by screaming at him to get up, criticizes Dennis for everything, thinks Dennis lies about most of the things he tells him, and is in every way a self-centered ass. What's worse, being in Florida with nothing to do but listen to his dad criticize and help him with even the absolute simplest of tasks really upsets Dennis and I hate seeing him upset. What was really bad though, was knowing that I couldn't yell at his father and tell him how awfully he treats his son. I don't want anyone hurting my Dennis, ever, and having to sit there and watch it really bothered me.
Otherwise, the trip was fantastic. I got home Monday evening and went shopping with my sister, Nicki, all day yesterday. Surprisingly, we didn't kill each other and even more surprisingly, I bought some clothes (anyone who knows me knows that I hate clothing shopping.) Nothing exciting today, babysat and went out with a my friend Mikey. Other than that, not too much to report besides the mindless diary sounding drivel that emanates from most other bloggers whose entries I've read. I should be able to make another post or two before I leave for Israel in a week including at least one political entry. I'll only be home for two days in between my return from the Mediterranean and college but once I arrive in Washington, I'm sure there will be much more to blog about. : o )
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I found this image and thought it depicted fairly well the way I've been feeling lately: miserable, hopeless, alone...I really don't think Dennis understands, but I also realize that I can't keep turning to him every time I get remotely upset. Tonight, I happen to be extremely depressed, but I don't know if he can distinguish between the various levels and stages I experience because of all the times I've had to ask him for help lately. I don't think he sees a difference in the times I'm kinda down and the times I'm hopelessly depressed like tonight. I hope I'm not bringing him down; I've always tended to push people away when I'm down to keep them from getting depressed as well, but its different with Dennis; I always seem to want Dennis around when I'm depressed and that's something that scares me. He'd see all the crazy, he'd be scared or worse, I'd start dragging him down with me and I never want to hurt him like that. I wish he understood how I feel, how my mind works, instead of just seeing that I wasn't happy. He's so incredibly sweet, he tries to help. He talks to me when I'm upset and that's really nice, talking to someone really, really helps, but at the same time, he carries on the conversation as if I wasn't hysterically crying. I don't know if he's just trying to get my mind off of everything or if he just doesn't know how to handle that kind of situation. I wish he knew. I wish I knew.
At the same time, I don't think I want him to understand because to truly understand how I'm feeling, he'd have to experience it.
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Because you'll probably destroy the White House playing manhunt when you're President.
Because you knew (and sang) the lyrics to Chicago when we saw it in the theater.
Because you write notes to the testing board over a map.
Because you can laugh at anything.
Because not only can you tolerate Tim Curry singing, you enjoy it.
Because you only order breakfast at diners.
Because you can ride your bike really, really fast.
Because cats are cute terrorists.
Because you're probably crazier than I am, but will never admit it.
Because you're fascinated by a trash can; I'll never understand that.
Because I feel as peaceful as you claim I look when you let me fall asleep in your arms.
Because if I asked you for the moon, you'd find some way to bring it to me.
Because you remember little anniversaries and the most insignificant of details about me.
Because you'll sing Frank Sinatra for me, and shouting from the rooftops if I asked.
Because you helped me discover myself and believe in me and everything I do.
Because you make me feel better about myself than I ever thought I could be.
Because if I didn't stop now, this list would never end.
Baby, I can't wait to see you on Sunday. XoXoXo -Me
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Blogger added a WYSIWYG (what you see is what you get) format bar to their website. It took me a while to figure out how to continue using Comic Sans as my primary font since they're options are the typical Arial, Times New Roman, etc. but I did it. It only took me a few hours to teach myself HTML when I established this site so changing a few fonts is nothing.
Anyway, I'm back in New Jersey and not surprisingly, there isn't much to report. I had a great time in Texas, but I had to come back up north. : o ( Since then, all I've been doing is running errands in preparation for the rest of my summer travels and college.
Dennis left for Florida (he lives down there with his dad every summer) the day I left for Texas and I miss him horribly. We ran up quite a phone bill last year. Fortunately, this year I was invited to visit him so I'm heading down to Miami on Sunday. : o ) I've never met his father, so I'm a bit nervous, but it should be alright. I can't wait to wrap my arms around him again.
Then, as many of you know, I'll be heading to Israel, and no, I'm not scared or in any way concerned about my safety while I'm there; everyone I mention the Israel trip to seems to ask me that almost instinctively. I'm leaving on my 18th birthday (August 5th for anyone who wants to give me presents) and returning on August 16th. Then literally before the jet lag has a chance to wear off, I'll be moving down to Washington, D.C. for school.
Other than that, I've really got no new information for you guys. I still haven't come up with a name for the political site I was planning to launch sometime this summer, although admittedly, that could be because I haven't really thought about it very much. Any suggestions?
Well, that's all for now; I promise to post something more interesting next time and when I'm done traveling, to post more often. Bye bye.
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1. You measure distance in hours. (For instance: Lubbock is 8 hours from Houston - who knows how many miles it is.)
2. You've ever had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
3. Stores don't have bags; they have sacks.
4. All the festivals across the state are named after a fruit, vegetable, grain, or animal.
5. You install security locks on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
6. You only own four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Tabasco.
7. You think sexy lingerie is a tee shirt and boxer shorts.
8. The local paper covers national and international news on one page but requires six pages for sports.(high school football is of utmost importance)
9. You find 90 degrees F "a little warm."
10. You know whether another Texan is from southern, middle, or northern Texas as soon as they open their mouth.
11. You know what a Luby's Cafeteria is.
12. There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population of 1000 or more.
13. You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.
14. Your classes were cancelled because of one mm of snow. (i.e. cold weather)
15. You can easily identify Poison Ivy
16. A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop ... it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor. (For example: "Welcome to the steak house, what kind of coke can I get you?")
These are so ridiculously true...ya'll that aren't from Texas might not get the humor in all of 'em and that's a real shame. Anyway, I'm visiting my grandparents back in Texas for a week. Its amazing how much I miss this place. People think its all just a bunch of desert, but its so much more...I'll be posting pictures when I get home...well, I haven't slept in over 30+ hours now, so I'm going to try to get some sleep. G'night prairie dogs...
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So they're laying the first brick (or huge slab of granite, as it were) of the 1,776 foot "Freedom Tower" today. Isn't our country truly brilliant? I mean, what went on in the meetings of the people who were designing this thing?
"Let's show the world just how arrogant we can be by building
the tallest building in the world."
Instead of promoting the understanding of why 9/11 happened, why the terrorists felt it necessary to attack a civilian building, and what we can do to prevent not only the terrorist acts in the future but also their sentiments, we have decided to defend our almost "macho" sense of American pride (comparable to the common American male's repeated defense of his own sexuality) by building a structure even bigger than those that were destroyed on 9/11. Is it just me, or are we actually giving terrorists a reason to hate America and its people even more? While I understand why the architects chose 1,776 feet to be the height of their structure, I'd like to remind the world how most of the people in the Twin Towers died on 9/11. Very few people perished by actually being in or being hit by one of the airplanes that struck the towers and only a slightly larger number of people were killed by the fire that the engine fuel maintained. Most of the people who died on 9/11 died because they couldn't escape the buildings and were killed when they collapsed. Point: Skyscrapers are dangerous. The designs of the Twin Towers were not conducive to the rescue or escape efforts of the people working in lower Manhattan that day. Now, I'm not proposing that we knock down every building over ten stories or even that we stop building skyscrapers all together, but we've reached a point where the financial advantage to building upward rather than buying more land and building outward risks human life. Human life will always be more valuable than office space...at least that's what little, insignificant me thinks. Apparently the architects and contractors rebuilding the World Trade Center site think otherwise, but what else is to be expected from American capitalists?
"Let's make a bigger target for terrorist activity the in northeast."
Why did the terrorists chose the Twin Towers? Hmm...very interesting. The fact that they were two large, civilian filled structures located in the center of the financial district of the city that is considered to be the economic heart of our country were probably reasons that weighed in to the terrorists' decision, no? Wait a minute! The Freedom Tower is going to be a large, civilian filled structure. And *gasp* its in the center of the financial district of the city that is considered to be the economic heart of our country. Brilliance, sheer brilliance. Ok, so this argument is a bit farfetched--sue me.
People wonder why the international community considers us to be ignorant, arrogant fools. Here it is, plain and simple: we are.
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Good morning all...and happy July. In case ya'll haven't noticed the time stamp on this entry, its near 4:00 AM, but who needs sleep anyway? I've got some fun news for my mini internet community.
First of all, in light of the attention that every single one of my politically oriented entries has received (emails from overseas, angry comments, etc.) I've decided to start a political website which should be ready for "public viewing" by the time I move to Washington, D.C. in mid-August. Hopefully, it will gain popularity around campus in the fall, but who knows? I'll have a link from this site to the new one when its ready and a link from that one here.
Here's the part I need help on...I need a title for the new site. I'd like something with a bit of wordplay (playing off the word "political" or "democracy" or something to that extent) but it doesn't have to be wordplay, anything insightful or humorous will be fine. So here's the deal...I'm making it a contest; whoever comes up with the best site name gets...um...something, that will be determined, but it'll be good.
You can enter the contest in either one of two ways...
1. You can post your entry (or entries) as a comment by clicking the "Comments" link directly below this entry. Be sure to fill in your email address so I can contact you if you win.
.................................................or...................................................
2.You can email your entry (or entries) to me by clicking the "Email Me" link located on the top left side of this page in the Contact Me section of the menu bar.
I promise the prize will be good, so enter as many (good) ideas as you can come up with...Ok, I really need some sleep...g'night...
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